Martokus blog - The Rants of a Marketing Noob

Google testing only 4 results per SERP

2010-11-07T14:08:00.000+02:00

I ran into this Google search result page today and was really surprised. Just 4 results... WOW. Here's the actual search page. I could not achieve the same with any other query that I tested.

The 10 most expensive hotels rooms in the World

2010-08-19T16:48:00.000+03:00

The site Wealth Bulletin has compiled a list of the World's top ten most expensive hotel rooms. Now it's time to start dreaming as I've put a collection of photos from the most expensive one. Ready? 1. Ty Warner Penthouse, Four Seasons, New York; $34,000 per night 2. Royal Penthouse Suite, President Wilson Hotel, Geneva; $33,000 per night 3. The

How I made $9999999.64 in 3 days with my personal blog. Almost.

2010-06-24T13:51:00.000+03:00

My recent attack on ViperChill (and his actions after that) just provoked me to write a more broader post on the topic of building a reputation online and cash it in by selling books or consultations. When do reality and lies mix up together to form the best sales strategy? We've all met them - people that boast themselves for succeeding online, claiming how they made thousands/ millions online

You have "silent but deadly" problem in the family bed? Now there's a solution

2010-06-16T11:52:00.000+03:00

Blanket with an inside layer of Activated Carbon Fabric which is used by the Military to protect against chemical weapons. Or as one of the commentators suggested - the Comfarter. The Better Marriage Blanket - Watch more Funny Videos

Why I think ViperChill is some sort of scam

2010-06-09T20:16:00.004+03:00

Disclaimer: I think ViperChill has an amazing writing talent and some of his posts are magnificent but some of his examples are more or less faked. Update: ViperChill is now in the comments with his version. Although I’m a marketing noob, I’m not a SEO noob and I think I have more than average knowledge in this matter. Thus I really get pissed off when someone tries to preach how 3

The worst short SEO jokes ever

2010-06-07T16:16:00.000+03:00

Changing SEOs is like changing decks on the Titanic. - How many SEOs does it take to change a light bulb? - I don't know, how many can you afford? - How many SEOs does it take to change a light bulb? - None, he'll have an Intern to do it. That way it will only cost $75 an hour. - How many SEOs does it take to change a light bulb? - None, they'd rather keep their clients in the dark. If it

Tips on selling SEO or how to lure more ignorant clients

2010-06-03T20:03:00.001+03:00

Disclamer: I’m not against SEO in general but against the SEO that most “gurus” are trying to sell. Yesterday I read in interview with Canadian guy Gab Goldenberg on StayOnSearch.com that immediately provoked me to respond. The exact lines that really got my attention are: “- When a potential client says “so when can I expect results”, what is your typical answer? When can they expect results?

PPC account review process - my version

2010-06-02T13:01:00.001+03:00

Last week Distilled published a very comprehensive flow chart regarding the PPC account review process. The chart itself contains all the necessary steps for checking an account but however I have comments on the starting point. The problem I see is that everyone is focused on the technical side of the things and seems to forget about the product and the consumer needs it satisfies. The logical

How united is the EU after all?

2010-05-31T20:39:00.000+03:00

What provoked my post is another stupid economic advice that I read this morning, namely "Greece urged to give up euro". The folks at The Centre for Economics and Business Research advise Greece to leave the Euro and return back to their own currency and devalue it. This tells it all. The Euro zone have never been united and will never be. The Euro is doomed at least with the current governing

Product names with hidden meaning

2010-03-10T16:36:00.000+02:00

More great product names here thanks to the Work Killer

14 photos that make you say WTF?!

2010-03-10T16:34:00.000+02:00

More available here

How to draw a robot in... MS Excel

2010-03-05T23:09:00.000+02:00

I think we all can learn from that guy. I have to admin I cannot achieve this even on plain paper...

Crazy french beat boxer

2010-03-05T22:51:00.000+02:00

Give a man an iPhone and the Everyday Looper app and just watch. This guy is amazing! Source: The next web

If love is so nice... why does it hurt so bad?

2010-03-05T22:41:00.000+02:00

Just saw hilarious answer to the trivial life question: If love's so nice, why does it hurt so bad? Pay attention to the first suggested answer. My man! Source: funpic.hu

Google CEO Eric Schmidt in 1986

2010-03-01T18:31:00.000+02:00

Today I saw unique video footage of Eric Schmidt from 1986. True nerd look I can say :D I think USA is the only country where those type of people actually become billionaires. Just look at the Russian or Arabian guys and you'll find big difference. Source: TechCrunch

2007-02-02T22:04:00.000+02:00

Drunk Russian guy... everybody has his bad days:)

Marketing definitions

2006-07-13T22:14:00.001+03:00

Here's some really entertaining marketing definitions that I was able to dig out from the archives. Enjoy :) You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." - That's Direct Marketing. You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "Clint Eastwood said I'm fantastic in bed." - That's Celebrity Marketing. You're at a party with a bunch of

Funny corporate lessons

2006-07-01T16:23:00.001+03:00

From the archives... Corporate Lesson 1 A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment